YOU CAN’T WIN

You cannot beat a narc, even when you are leaving them. They will wallow in self pity refusing to perform any chores. Our narc doesn’t care that he spoilt our Christmas, nearly drove me to suicide and ruined our lives. No, his own life is over and his life is paramount. I despair that we never got through to him. The truth is that he felt entitled to be vile for whatever justification he gave himself. What if I had killed myself because of him? Would he have felt any self blame? Mother would have blamed him, and he would have gone to bed for the day feeling sorry for himself. When mother does leave him, he is not going to blame himself. Yes, it is good she be free, but he is not sorry for behaviour so atrotious that it could have led to my death. We will leave him knowing that his selfish Ness is as impenetrable as a brick wall – a wailing wall which circles a cold heart. A stone wall to conquer all decency.

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